A Super-Helper’s Guide to Gifting & Receiving

If you’re a super-helper who loves gifting, this blog is my gift to you 🎁

But beware, even giving gifts has a darker side.



Which of these common super-helper gifting habits do you recognise?


1)   You love giving gifts. It’s like gifting is in your blood

2)   You always know exactly what each person wants (you don’t need to refer to generic ‘gift guides’)

3)   You spend hours scrolling online searching for that unique and special gift ( you know it’s out there somewhere)

4)   You are generous (even when you can’t afford to be)

5)   You like to buy a mountain of gifts for every person (one is never enough!)

6)   You ignore your cashflow (you can worry about that next year!)



Super-Helper’s tend to be wonderful at gifting


If you scored 4 or above, you are the ultimate gift-giver (and you quite like this about yourself). 



Is it always compassionate gifting?


At the core of gifting is the expression of love, a way to connect to others and foster healthy relationships. However, to the over-gifter super-helper, gifting can become wrapped up in your self-image.




Ask yourself these questions…


Q1. Are you addicted to giving? (your brain’s reward system is activated)

Q2. Are you giving to be liked or thanked? (your compassion has become manipulation)

Q3. Are you giving to the right people? (not everyone deserves your efforts)

Q4. Are you risking resentment? (by buying them gifts they can’t afford)

Q5, Do you find it easier to give than to receive? (maybe your needs aren’t being met)





Receiving is a healthy marker for a Super-Helper


Super-Helper’s see themselves as people who do the giving, not the recipient. They want to delight in the other person’s delight. Yet the balance of reciprocity – giving and taking – is a sign of a healthy relationship. Learning to receive with grace is just as important as compassionate giving. 

Practice receiving gifts with grace (let other people delight in giving too)

You deserve to receive as much as you give

If you find receiving quite awkward, then repeat after me…






Your next step . . .

Buy my award-winning book, The Super-Helper Syndrome: A Survival Guide for Compassionate People

Get immediate access to the LIFESTYLE REVIEW 2024 coaching workbook

Get immediate access to a free copy of my Compassion At Work workbook

Follow me on socials @JessBakerPsych or using #SuperHelperSyndrome

Book a free Clarity Call to discuss working with me: https://calendly.com/jessbaker


Super-Helper Syndrome JESS BAKER ROD VINCENT

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